The darkness of the past and the promise of the future were shared to more than 220 attendees in Turner Theater on Oct. 28 as released hostage Moran Stela Yanai shared the story of her 54 days held captive by Hamas with the audience.
All the seats in Turner Theater were filled with the students, alumni and community members who came to listen to Yanai’s story. Once the seats were full, attendees chose to stand in the back of the room, as well as sit on the stairs.
Yanai began her lecture by acknowledging the difficulty of sharing her trauma, but quickly shifted the focus to the spirit that allowed her to survive.
On Oct. 7, 2023 Hamas-led militants stormed into Israel from the Gaza Strip, killing around 1,200 people, mostly civilians, and abducting 251 others, Yanai being one of them.
Yanai was vending at the Nova Music festival, where she was running a table to sell her handmade jewelry.
“At 6 a.m. in the morning, there was this beautiful sunrise,” Yanai said. “Everybody speaks about that moment, because in that moment you see the people's faces, you see how happy they are, and then you see that there is no judgment.”
However, Yanai said it all changed 29 minutes later when rockets started filling the sky.
Yanai said in her speech that after serving in the Israeli Defense Forces, Israel's army, 23 years ago, she recognized sounds she was hearing in the atmosphere.Yanai said she recognized the sounds of the weapons, and she said it was not what Israelis would use.
“We don't fight in that way.” Yanai said, “I heard the automatic weapons, and we are not allowed to shoot with automatic weapons.”
This is when Yanai said she knew that the weapons were being used by Hamas.
Yanai negotiated her way out of two attempted abductions, but she was eventually taken by 13 Hamas militants.
As Yanai shared her story with the attendees, she called the audience to live each day with purpose. After being treated brutally for 54 days, Yanai shared that every challenge has a reason.
“Every challenge a person faces is not meant to break him or her, but to reveal the strength that was hidden within that person,” Yanai said.
She said she lives each day to the fullest and did so within captivity, with her strength and her faith keeping her alive.
The evening’s atmosphere was emotional to many, leaving some attendees in tears. She spoke to how prayer got her through and said that if students were to live every challenge with strength and perseverance, they can get through it. She said for those struggling in life, her practices got her through each and every day.
“If I have to sum up my entire experience, it's faith, values and mind over body,” Yanai said.
Yanai said through this all, strength and her trust in God woke her up every morning.
“Resilience is trusting who you are. It's just standing on your agenda. It doesn't mean it doesn't matter how many people would say bad things about that agenda, you know,” Yanai told Elon News Network “I want to be free, to be at peace, to be able to enjoy life. As long as I create myself, my reality and my environment, anybody can say whatever they want, this is my agenda and this is what I want to be and what I wanna do.”
Yanai said through it all, she lived with a thought in her head: “‘Why’ doesn’t get you anywhere, but ‘What for’ can.”
She said her story is not a one person story. Yanai said she speaks not for herself, but because others cannot. Throughout her lecture, she named people she was held hostage with that were murdered such as Carmel Gat.
“So instead of asking why, I remind you what for.” Yanai said “I promise her and I'll do my best every single day, even if my best today is taking my right foot out of bed, that I will manage to get out of the house today, I'll do my best because she didn't go through what she went through for nothing.”
The climax of the evening came as she shared a short video clip of her release, showing the moment she finally saw her parents. The audience rose to a standing ovation as the video ended.
Yanai shared in an interview with Elon News Network that the picture she had in her head whilst in captivity was replicated in her reunification and her parents were wearing the same outfits she had imagined.
"I had a victory picture in my head," Yanai told Elon News Network. "My victory picture was my mother and father coming towards me and that got me through everything, seeing my mother wearing the exact thing I had pictured."
Yanai said her journey was marked by psychological manipulation and physical pain. While held in family homes by Hamas, she said she was told daily that no one was looking for her. In addition to this, Yanai said while she was in captivity both of her legs were broken by militants and she was forced to walk on her broken legs by those holding her captive.
“He took the cast off, he gave me a pair of heels,” Yanai said. “He looked at me, and he smiled, and he said, ‘put the heels on, we're going.’ And I told him that ‘I can't go on heels and go down six floors by foot.’ But he gave me the face, it's either that or you're done.”
Yet, Yanai said she refused to become a prisoner in her mind — choosing faith and inner strength over the fear instilled in her by Hamas. Yanai said that the only way she was able to walk down 6 flights of stairs and continue walking for over an hour was putting her mind over her body.
The story, as Rabbi Mendy Minkowitz, supervisor of Elon Chabad noted, shows that in the past 24 months the Jewish community saw the strength, courage and faith of their people.
“To those like Muran who faced unimaginable darkness and still emerged with light wherever one turned, we saw the power of faith, of courage and of unity,” Minkowitz said. “We saw how, when tested, the Jewish soul doesn't collapse, it shines brighter.”
Copper Walsh, co-president of Elon Chabad said attendees felt moved by this event.
“There's a lot of unknown out there, and this is just a good event for students to come to and hear firsthand perspective,” Walsh said.
The event was held not to recount every moment of darkness, but to turn students to action, Yanai said. She called students to use their voices, especially on social media platforms, to change the narrative. She stressed the importance of sharing Jewish culture, including their values and their kindness.
“I have to fight this fight and I have to be able to walk in Germany or to walk in Amsterdam or to walk in London in the street,” Yanai told Elon News Network. “Sharing my story — Star of David exposed — not being afraid to speak my Hebrew. We really want to be able to be free.”
She said it is integral that the Jewish community shares their culture and shows who they are.
Sarah T. Moore contributed to the reporting of this story.